Falling in Love.....

One of my favorite questions to ask people when I first meet them is about their love story. How did they meet, what was their first impression, how did they know that the other person was THE ONE? I ask it for a million different reasons—it is usually a practiced story, one that they have told many times, so it is often a very good story, and is usually one that they love to tell.

I also ask the question because this tells me something about how people make a decision—if you married your third grade boyfriend that you dated for 25 years before deciding to get married, you are a different decision maker than I am, because I was engaged to my husband five months after we met. (for our story, scroll down to the end of the post) Looking for a house is a little bit like looking for a spouse. You have definite ideas about what you like as respects the structure: brick, no stucco or frame, or six feet tall, blue eyes. It is a common comment by realtors that their clients often end up buying the exact type of house that they initially said they hated! That probably happens with spouses as well, I’m guessing.

A good way to begin looking is with the basic requirements in mind—a price range that you feel comfortable in (often much less than what you have been approved for by your mortgage broker or banker,) minimum number of bedrooms, and number of bathrooms. From there, it is important to keep an open mind.

Will you be struck by a lightning bolt like Al Pacino was in The Godfather when he first laid eyes on his Italian wife?

Or will you grow to appreciate the home’s attributes, after an initial “meh” reaction? Maybe it is best to ask yourself the question, “If someone else buys the house, will I be very disappointed?” Some clients of mine really liked a home when they first saw it with me, but they had just begun to look. In order to feel comfortable making such a big decision, they continued to look at other homes, always comparing them to the first house they saw. One Sunday, there was an open house, so I suggested that they go and give it a second look. They open house was very crowded. My client told me that her immediate reaction to all of the people being there was, “Hey, get out of my house!” That’s when they realized that they absolutely wanted that home. They made an offer, and are very happily living there today.

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One of the most important things to remember, in love and houses, is to take your time, and go at a pace that is comfortable for you and how you like to make decisions. Your realtor should be your guide, your confidante, and your companion in the process, and maybe give you a gentle nudge in the right direction…but only when you need it. It is a critical relationship in the decision making process.

In honor of Valentine’s Day, here is our story:

My husband and I met on the telephone. It was 1992, and we were working in the insurance business in Chicago; he was an underwriter, and I was a broker. I called his office to speak to his boss, and Andrew picked up the phone instead. (his company did not yet have that new fangled invention called voicemail) After speaking on the phone several times, Andrew decided to wander down the street to my office to see what I looked like (Facebook, Linked in, and the internet were not yet invented) With no security to stop him in my office’s high rise tower, he got in the elevator and wandered around the floor looking for my cubicle. When I wasn’t there, he asked a colleague where I was, and was told that I was down the hall in a meeting. Peeking into the side windows of the conference room, Andrew spotted three women in the meeting. Still not sure which one was me, (I think his exact quote to me later was that “any one of you would do”—a practical man!) he called me later to ask me for lunch, and we were engaged five months later. And I still love him to bits!